I read an article by H.B. London Jr., who serves as the Vice-President of Pastoral Ministries at Focus on the Family that was entitled Maintaining Positive Staff Relations. The article majored on three key points that I think are universally beneficial in all relationships not just those working together as a church staff.  I am certain that he would agree.  Therefore, I want to give you my thoughts on these 3 keys to healthy relationships.

Communication
One of the fastest ways to create a distant feeling in any relationship is to eliminate communication.  Communication is the aspect of a relationship that allows us to know one another and to be concerned about what is going on in each other’s lives.  It helps us to know what things are going on around us that effect us, how we feel about those things, and affords us the opportunity to show concern and compassion.  Who knows, we might even be able to offer a helping hand.

In addition to creating an emotional connection it helps us to be informed about what is going on.  Decisions can be made together, plans can be discussed, issues can be dealt with, etc… Tension only increases when individuals and groups do not have the opportunity to discuss the things that are important to them.

Expectation
Disagreements and disappointment occur in any relationship when there are unmet expectations.  This is the key elements to discuss in any relationship when there is time for communication.  Whether it is a dating relationship, marriage, co-workers, or a sports team, everyone needs to know what is expected of them so that they can decide for themselves whether or not this is a healthy relationship for them to be in.  If expectations are not clearly communicated there can be no realistic way to evaluate another’s intentions or performance.  Any two people will see things differently, and the more people you add to the equation the more complex it becomes.  So the more people that are involved the more critical it becomes to have clearly communicated expectations.

Loyalty
Any relationship is concreted by the willingness of the participants to seek one another’s best interest over the long haul.  Loyalty is not about staying even if you don’t want to.  It is centered around thinking highly of someone and communicating that to them and others by what we say and do.  If we publicly or privately criticize those that we are supposed to be in relationship with our loyalty to that relationship is in jeopardy and we need to get to the root of the issue through some much needed communication.

Good relationships are critical to our having a meaningful and satisfying life.  I hope this helps you put some things in perspective for you.